"You" he said, "are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain."
I had such high hopes for 2017, I still do. Just, I believe this year will be the year that will officially make or break me. Survive or die. This will either be the year I let fear take the back seat and take charge, or I keep letting fear control me. This will either be the year I find out why I stayed alive when I been fighting against self harm and suicide for a very, very long time. I am so scared that I will cave, that this will be the year I decide no more. I have never, ever, been this lost before! I don't know how much longer I'm going to live in Cali, I may need to move back to Las Vegas, I personally don't want to but it's cheaper meaning I can get my own place and I can be there for my family unlike I am now. But I don't want to leave Cali but I can not live with these people much longer because I hate my life here and all I want to do is put a gun to my head, they are triggers every second while I'm here and it's not good to be around people that do that to you. I don't know where I am going but I do know I'll hold true to me, the me I love and nobody knows or understands lol