Softball tonight! I honestly had a really hard time getting motivated and ready to go. Rough day on the home front.... I prayed and tried to rally myself and the kids together all day. But after bickering all day, rough homeschool day ( which also happened to be the best we have had in a week...) and leaving late for softball. Again.
I just couldn't stop the tears from silently flowing the whole drive to softball. Which was sad, becuase just a few hours earlier I texted Daniel saying how proud I was of myself that a hard day here and there doesn't break me like it used to years ago. But here I was, trying to play it cool, begging God to help me pull it together while the tears just came a rolling, poorly disguised underneath my aviators. It's hard feeling like you come up short when you feel your trying your hardest.
And im just so stink'in tired!
But you know what? Where my strength ends, God's begins. And because He lives in me, I am made whole and perfect. Shortcomings are a side effect of being human, but Christ in me makes me whole and beautiful. Because of that, He doesn't focus on my bad days or shortcomings, so neither will I. He enables me to tap into His strength and his love, when mine is totally out. And just like I shouldn't become prideful and boastful on the good I do, becuase it's all becuase of Him. I shouldn't take the weight of the world on my shoulders and focus on my weaknesses. Because those are His too. He'll take those and make my burden light and turn my weakness into something beautiful. It's a way for Him to show just how much I need Him and how much He can love me... because It's an aweful lot.
And when He fills my cup and I feel His love in my life, then I'm able to let it overflow into the lives of my family and all around me.
The day was rough, but ended on a sweet note. And I can lay here in bed not consumed, but with a peace and deep sense of joy that comes only from being comforted by the comforter and Prince of Peace.
Goodnight world! I pray God speaks joy and peace into your lives as well this evening ♡