Black ink. White paper. Every morning I make a commitment to read a little bit and see what I get from my Lord. Right now he’s walking me through a lot of healing from anger and bitterness and loneliness. He’s also driving home how we haven’t been faithful to follow his command to be in a community. Don’t get me wrong, we have a small but very closely knit support system in our lives that we LOVE and see frequently. Some family, but a hodgepodge group of amazing friends who get it. Get what our life has looked like for the past 15 months. But we ghosted on our community when C was born. Some out of necessity (we had to be up near his hospital for 5 months, then extreme isolation because of RSV and his oxygen dependency), but then it was just because of us. It got easy to sit in our pit. I’m trying to be more transparent about our life and journey because when you put stuff like all this out there, you find that more people get it than don’t. Part of that journey for us has been an extended time is isolation. Partly for need, partly because you’re trying to protect yourself and your family. Isolation is terrible for the mind and spirit. We’re working on breaking out. We’re also going to strive to find a new place in our old community because it’s a pull God placed on both John and I. We can’t be partially committed anymore and then wonder why healing is slow to come. Gods so faithful though. He’s so merciful too because every morning as I get my head in a good place for my day, he lovingly tells me “I get it. Look at who I use. They understand loneliness and isolation too. I get that too I was there too.” We have a good high priest.
Times of Silence
“I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.”
-Psalm 40:1-3 .
If you have been listening to any Christian radio in the past year, you have probably heard the song “Oceans” by Hillsong United. The most known line is, “Spirit lead my where my faith is without borders, let me walk upon the water, in the presence of my savior.” I absolutely love this song and I remember wonderful times of incredible worship singing to this song.
But what about the times when we feel as though the lake has dried up, and we are left in the vacancy of spiritual emptiness? What about when we don’t see immediate answers to our prayers? Has God forsaken us and turned his back?
It can be extremely difficult when we don’t hear a clear and distinct message from God. But in these times, I remember of the story of Abraham (From Genesis, the one with many sons). God spoke to Abraham saying that his descendants would cover the ends of the earth. Then Abraham was left in silence for 25 years without hearing from God! But God came through and was faithful to his promise providing a child, the future of God’s people. This story reminds me that, even in times of silence, GOD IS ALWAYS THERE!
One of my favorite passages in the Bible comes from Psalm 40. It begins as the Psalmist patiently waiting in silence, then God coming through setting his feet on solid down and pulling out of the difficult times. How wonderful it is that God hears our cry, and gives us songs of joy! Remember that God is faithful and he is with you in times perceived silence. This week I challenge you to pray guidance, and even if you are met with silence, know that God is there.
#Psalm40:5-16 "Many, O LORD my GoD, are the wonders you have done.
The things You planned for us, no one can recount to You; were I to speak and tell of them,they would be too many to declare ... But may all who seek You
REJOICE and BE GLAD in You..." •
Have a glorious #sunday everyone.